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Writer's pictureFran Bell

Letting Fear Fade Away

"We gain strength, courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face…we must do that which we think we cannot." ~ Eleanor Roosevelt


Recently I offered a journaling workshop to my clients and followers on social media. What I didn’t share until now is that it took me months to gather the courage to prepare, offer, and market that workshop. I was immobilized with fear. Unable to write a single email. My mind went blank leaving room for a flood of critical, judgmental voices.


Being on the other side of that now, I have so much compassion for the me that was paralyzed with fear AND I feel proud and confident of the me that looked fear in the face and took the steps anyway. The fear faded early on and I walked away from the experience with valuable information for how to successfully manage the fear should it resurface.


What about you?


Is there something in your life that you’ve been wanting to do, that you’ve tucked away in the back of your mind, held for someday in the future?


Is fear the reason you’re not doing it?


Do you shut down the idea of it, preferring to remain in the cozy confines of your comfort zone?


It might be something light like learning to surf or paint. Or it might be something heavier like healing, or leaving, a ruptured relationship or managing an addiction.


Research shows that by doing the thing you’re scared of the fear fades away. Sounds counterintuitive but that’s exactly what I experienced.


If you look back at your life, can you find an example where this was true? When you did something you thought you could not, and the fear faded? It’s likely that you came away from that event with a sense of achievement and joy.


And the great thing is, it doesn’t matter how well, or not well, you do the thing that frightens you, just having done it erodes the fear and creates self-confidence.


Growth requires stretching beyond your comfort zone. Past the predictability and comfort of your life as it is now, and into the discomfort of the unknown. And uncertainty is scary.


So, how can you prepare yourself for the discomfort that comes with growing and trying new things?


Here’s a strategy that I have found effective personally and for my clients:

  1. Identify what you want to try and why it scares you.

  2. Reflect on past experiences where you faced fear. How did you overcome it? How can you apply those lessons now?

  3. Envision how your life will improve once you conquer this fear.

  4. Outline actionable, easy, steps you can take right now to move forward.

  5. Anticipate potential obstacles along the way, such as anxiety, self-doubt, or criticism and plan how you will navigate through them in advance.

  6. Cultivate self-compassion and kindness towards yourself during the discomfort that will come.

  7. Embrace your unique path and progress at your own pace.

I invite you this week to do one thing that scares you.


Give it a try. I would be thrilled to hear about your experience.



If you desire support in trying something new or exploring other ways to create the life you want, feel free to book a free 30-minute consultation with me. Let's embark on a journey of self-discovery together.


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